"I Want a Soft Shell, and This is a Stick-Up"

Thank you, Kate Furst, for pointing out this list of The 30 Best Taco-Related Crimes , which one would never imagine could even be a thing that exists.
This is my favorite:

Featured acts of taco-induced terrorism include a man who threw a Malatov Cocktail into a Taco Bell because his chalupa did not contain the extra meat he was promised, a woman in a wheelchair who "rammed herself through a glass door" to enter a closed Taco Bell, and taco thieves who wielded machetes, shotguns, and knives.
Brings a whole new meaning to Taco Hell. I like my tacos, but damn, son.