Every year for Christmas, my mom and dad give me a gift certificate to Red Lobster. I don't know why. I appreciate it, but I don't understand it. Maybe they think it will remind me of family vacations, cause we were the family that went to the beach, passed the local seafood shack, and went straight to Red Lobster. Anyway, I get $25 annually to spend on whatever my heart desires at Red Lobster, when all my heart desires is this:
Please note the grease stains in the biscuit basket.
So Liz should really be blogging this because she LOVES RED LOBSTER, but we went on an Eat Me excursion last Sunday with Travis and Cody, Knoxville's Cutest Couple, and I cashed that shit in. Travis enjoyed the ULTIMATE FEAST of like everything on the menu on one plate and Liz ate crab legs like they were Jude Law's penis. I don't know what Cody ate because I wasn't paying attention, but I do remember that he does not like shrimp and did not want any of the shrimp that Travis was offering him, including maybe the one in Travis's pants cause he probably got too full on cheddar biscuits and beer and didn't want to have sex that night.
I should have ordered $25 of the "Sunset Passion Colada" (WHICH WAS DELICIOUS) and just eaten 10 baskets of Cheddar Bay Biscuits (is Cheddar Bay in Wisconsin, and if so, do the Great Lakes contain lobster?), but instead I had the Four Course Seafood Feast, which is hard to say for some reason, and I'm from Cookeville, Tennessee, so my four courses were all fried and/or came with Ranch dressing. (Side note: longest run-on sentence ever). Except the brownie, which the waitress aptly instructed me to "microwave for 40 seconds" and I can confirm that it was so good at 2 in the morning drizzled with chocolate sauce from a plastic ramekin.
Traditionally circular with a fluted exterior, ramekins can also be found in novelty shapes, such as flowers, hearts or stars. I plagiarized (LIZ: SPELLING BEE WORD) that from Wikipedia. There's a handy link in case you've never heard of Wikipedia.
I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore.